The Art of Saying No!

As I mentioned in a recent post, learning to sail is probably the easier part of cruising.  It's hard to leave the dock!  As I mentioned in that post, we've had our challenges but we've overcome a lot of them in the past year.  The next hurdle will no doubt also be a challenge ... closing our businesses and saying "No"!

I'm not underestimating the hardship of turning in a resignation to the boss, but closing a business has it's extra set of hardships.  Both Ken and I work in the housing industry, where jobs may not be completed until months down the line.  While I can stop showing properties when the time comes, things are a bit more difficult for Ken.  

The next few months will involve finishing up our daughter's house and getting Nirvana out of the boatyard.  However, the bills still need to be paid so we're not shutting down our businesses just yet.  Therefore, Ken has the difficult task of juggling his business with our goals.  I swear life can be a tease sometimes ... just when you think it's time to switch gears the phone doesn't stop ringing!  It's been difficult to tell a potential client that their construction project will have to wait at least 2 months for Ken.  Although that addition or kitchen remodel is a luxury and a "want" to me, it sure isn't to the people that want it.  You'd think that their lives were at stake when told that they'd have to wait for Ken to start.  

Ken has tried to delicately tell some clients that he is just too busy to do their jobs, but then they say they'll wait until he has time.  Don't they know that we wanna get outta here?!  Actually, they don't.  Other than close friends and family, we don't tell too many people about our plans.  It seems that most folks don't take us seriously ... or think we're nuts.  So, Ken tries to "kill them softly" by saying that he understands if they wanna get another contractor ... if only it were that easy.  They wanna wait, not knowing that at some point we've gotta say "NO"!

I think part of the difficulty of saying "no" is that society raises us to be nice, be generous, be empathetic.  We're raised to believe that "no" is a selfish word.

Then there's the guilt that comes with turning down work.  Again, our society raises us to "work hard" ... only a lazy person would turn down work, right?  

Well, we've learned that society ain't always right!  In fact, if we were to go along with the trend of society, we'd work until the day we died because we'd be in debt up to our ears.  But, we'd sure have a nice car, home and the latest trends in technology ... we're not buying it!  We ARE hard working, kind people.  We're NOT lazy ... we just don't wanna work the rest of our lives.  There's an expiration date, and who knows when that is? 

Yes, we all should be empathetic and self-sustaining individuals,  Yes, we should all have pride in accomplishing something ... but does that something have to be reflected in material items?  Yes, hard work can make a person feel good ... but does it have to be at a job?  How about hard work restoring an old boat?!  Yes, we should be generous ... but does it mean we have to put ourselves last?

Anyway, Ken and I are working on the art of saying "no".  Whether it's to a client or to a birthday party, we've got to start using this word a lot more often in our vocabulary.  To be honest, I'm a little bit better at this already.   For the past few years, I've been saying "no" to Mary Kay parties, Tupperware parties, Pampered Chef parties ... and on and on.  I swear if I didn't say "no" to the invites I'd never be home in the evenings ... and I'd be constantly pulling out my wallet!  I don't do these parties, so I'd also never host one.  There's nothing wrong with them, but I've made a rule to always so "no" to these.   

Family functions can be a bit more difficult.   We truly love our family, and we want to spend time with them.  But, our time is limited and we can't make every kid's birthday party and every holiday gathering.  We choose which get-togethers to attend wisely, and we cherish those memories.

While our plans are pretty solid, our timeline is a bit sketchy.  We'd like to think that after our daughter's house is complete and Nirvana is in the marina we'll have a better idea of our time frame,  We hope that no later than this time next year we'll be wrapping things up, if not already gone.  Until then, Ken plans to take a few jobs for income while tackling the "must do" projects on Nirvana.

It really is hard to train your brain to go against everything you thought was "right".  But, we've learned that putting ourselves first isn't selfish, and it isn't "wrong".   As the male in the family, I think that Ken sometimes worries about our plan not going as predicted and failing us.  I've assured him that I'm all in and I want to do this.  In fact, I'm gonna crazy if we don't!  I have a brain, and I have a dream.  Nobody is twisting my arm and if things don't go as planned, it's not because the male partner "failed" us.  We're a team and we're equals ... again, society has raised us to think differently.

So, sorry if we don't attend your social gathering or we make you pay more by hiring another contractor to do your jobs (did I tell you that I think Ken is way too cheap for his talent?).  As they say ... "Just Say No"!

I'm sure this is a topic that is far too common, but not talked about very much.  We'd love to hear your thoughts.

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

A Day Of War

As the Japanese fleet was headed to Pearl Harbor, Americans were enjoying the sun and sand in Honolulu.

A week ago today, Ken and I went to the WWII Museum with my Dad, our daughter and future son-in-law.  My birthday was a few days earlier, and instead of dinner out or gifts I wanted tickets to the museum.  Our daughter's fiancee was able to score five free tickets from his boss!

Let me tell you ... every American should spend at least one day at this museum.  We thoroughly enjoyed our visit, although it was a sobering experience.  I really didn't know many details of the war, and the museum did a great job of presenting a ton of information in a way that was easy to understand.  The 4D movie produced with Tom Hanks (about 45 minutes) was a must see!  I left with a much greater knowledge of what caused the war and how it finally ended.  What happened during those six years in between were both awesome and awful.

Our country was pretty much thrown into the war when Pearl Harbor was bombed by Japan on December 7, 1941.  We quickly sprung into action, as we were fighting Japan and their Emperor to our West while fighting Germany and Hitler to our East.  The women stepped in to replace the jobs the men had left behind and production of planes, tanks and ships exploded.  

I found it interesting that the Higgins boat was produced in New Orleans, and tested in Lake Pontchartrain.  With a big gate that dropped down in the front, these amphibious boats were able to carry a massive amount of men and jeeps/equipment from ship to shore.  Over 20,000 boats were produced, and the shipyard went from about 75 employees to over 25,000 within five years.  Needless to say, the war made Higgins a very wealthy man.  General Dwight D. Eisenhower later said that Higgins "won the war for us". 

Eisenhower and his staff made some tough decisions, such as whether or not to move forward on D-day when faced with terrible weather.  Ultimately, Eisenhower's staff was divided and the decision fell on Eisenhower himself.  After much thought, he decided to move forward and invade the shores of Normandy, France on June 6, 1944.  Stories of seasick and exhausted men on the Higgins boats faced with the dreaded words, "Drop the gate".  Once that gate dropped, they were in waist deep water fighting for their lives ... many didn't survive.  That first wave of men were virtually wiped out. 

Our country also came up with some brilliant ideas.  In order to throw off Hitler, a Hollywood movie crew created and placed fake tanks and military equipment in a different part of France than we actually attacked.  Hitler, the coward that he was, ultimately committed suicide on April 30, 1945 when faced with defeat. 

On the other side of the world, we were fighting Japan.  Our men didn't realize how prepared Japan was, and when they first saw explosions throughout the night in the distance they cheered.  They didn't realize that those explosions were our men being blown up.  The Japanese soldiers were brutal and were more than willing to die while killing Americans.  Ever heard the term kamikaze ... that was the name given to the Japanese pilots that committed suicide by flying their plane into ships.  There were about 4000 kamikaze pilots, and about 14% of them hit a ship.  Even after the defeat of Germany, Japan wouldn't surrender.

After hearing about D-day, soldiers were relieved to hear that they wouldn't have to invade the shores of Japan.  The newly created nuclear bomb took care of that with two bombings of Japan in August, 1945.  The picture below is a test of the nuclear explosion in the Marshall Islands.

I could go on and on about what I learned during our "day of war" at the museum, and I wasn't even able to read/watch half of the stories available!  There were so many stories ... some told by written posts and others told by veterans through short videos.  There were pictures of veterans on a touchscreen, and by touching their face their story began.  One elderly black veteran told the story of seeing a wounded sailor lying on top of a gun, needing assistance.  When he grabbed the wounded man's shoulder to ask him where he'd been hit ... his entire shoulder and arm came off in his hands.  He stuffed his fist into the sailor's wound until a doctor arrived.  The old man said, "You don't forget about something like that".  No, I'm sure you don't.

The museum also has lots of relics and pictures from the war ... some of them heart warming and some really gruesome.  I've continued to think about what I've learned over the past week.  War is a terrible thing.  I now wonder what my own grandfathers experienced during the war.  I wish they were still alive to tell me.  My mom's dad was a merchant marine, and I think of the picture of him in uniform with my grandmother ... so handsome.  I need to get a copy of that picture.  My dad's father (also handsome in uniform below) was a radio bomber and was stationed on the islands of the Pacific.  He never spoke of the war to my Dad, but he did tell my grandmother a funny story.  He said that the island women were topless and given t-shirts by the American soldiers.  The women graciously accepted the shirts, but they felt they needed to make a few changes ... they cut holes in them to let their breasts hang out!

While at the museum, we were able to find a brick with my grandfather's name on it.  My dad had purchased the brick when the museum was built, and it also shows my grandfather's date of birth and death.   Also while at the museum, my dad pulled out a small blue velvet pouch that contained a cross inside.  He said that the cross was carried by his grandfather (the father-in-law of my grandfather below) while fighting in World War II.  I never knew of this cross, and I can only imagine the stories it carries.  Again, I wish I could ask.

 

Edward A Daspit, Sr ... radio bomber

As you can probably tell, our visit to the museum moved me and that is why I highly recommend that you visit it if you're around New Orleans, LA.  It's a history lesson that we should all experience.

 

A few days later was Thanksgiving, and I thought again of the veterans that have tried to live a normal life and put the war behind them ... while the rest of the country moved on and forgot.  I also thought of the many that gave their lives for our freedom.  Could you imagine what our country would be like if Hitler had won the war?!   On Thanksgiving I also thought of today's war and the new wave of killed and wounded Americans ... so many.  

Lately I often find myself frustrated with my own circumstances ... this year hasn't produced what I was sure it would.  But, when I think of the freedom I have and what my ancestors endured for that freedom ... I am truly thankful.  On Thanksgiving, I had a great meal of fried turkey and all the fixin's with my husband, our daughter and her fiancee at the local Copeland's restaurant.  Good food, wine and great company ... couldn't ask for a better day!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

A Shut Down?!

It's been two weeks since my last post.  Sorry I haven't written, but with constantly working and barely paying the bills ... Ken and I decided to "shut down" for the past two weeks.  We slept late, lounged on the sofa and watched re-runs of "The Wonder Years", ignored the bills and ate junk food all day.  We blew off our responsibilities, went shopping, charged up the credit cards, and figured we'd worry about the consequences later.  Why do today what we could do tomorrow?

Are you reading this and thinking we've become irresponsible losers?  Come on ... do you think we'd really run our household like our government runs the country?!  Nope, we'd never actually do those things.  If so, cruising would never be in our future and we'd be in debt up to our eyeballs.  

Believe me, there have been many times lately that we wanted to stay in bed, pull the covers over our heads and hit the "STOP" button for a little while.  But, that's not how we were raised.  We've got obligations and it's our responsibility to keep our end of the deal.  We don't buy anything without first knowing how we're gonna pay for it.  If things get tough, we sacrifice.

So no, we haven't been eating bon-bons and watching tv for the past two weeks.  We've both been busy working and keeping things together.  Things have been a blur.  I haven't posted because I've been busy with clients, open houses, and even had that closing I was hoping for.  Whew, that really helped relieve my stress ... for a month or two.  I've also taken a part-time job, which happens to be at the real estate company that I work for.  I'm answering the phone two days a week, and although it's not much money ... it's something.  Actually, I've been having this little job for a few months now but have been looking for another job (full or part-time) to make ends meet.  So, when I mentioned in my last post that I was looking for a job ... that was meant to be in addition to real estate and answering the phone twice a week.

Anyway, those two days of working for someone else really shortens the week and keeps me off the internet more often.  Mix in an unusually busy couple of weeks in real estate and I'm left with no extra time for writing.  You may not have noticed, but I also rarely get on the internet on the weekends.  I have a "dumb phone", which means the only way I'm gonna get on Facebook or write a post is to sit in front of the computer.  I avoid this on the weekends, as I think it's a good idea to "disconnect" on a regular basis.

Real estate has once again slowed down and I'm catching up on things.  I did get together with a couple of girlfriends last night for wine and appetizers ... so much needed!  Plus, I won a $25 gift card to the place we went (at a recent real estate function) ... so it didn't cost me anything.  Ken has started our lazy jack/sail pack project, and our lazy jack lines are now on our mast thanks to a friend climbing our mast.  We'd hoped to finish the project this weekend, but it looks like we may have a tropical storm headed our way ... just when we thought we'd avoided those this year.  It shouldn't be too bad ... just a PITA.

I tell ya, the government shutdown and chaos only emphasizes our desire to be free from being held hostage by the government's decisions.  I've never wanted to be dependent on a man (and never have .. I've always paid my own bills and split everything), and I don't wanna depend on the government.  When we no longer have so much "stuff", we'll get by at a slow and steady pace ... on a small income.  That will mean very little taxes, and less ties to the government's woes. We love our country and always will but ... the government needs a major over-haul.  No matter what side you're on, it's gotten ridiculous.  We may need more room on our boat for friends and family!

As the American Sailing Association said, "You can't shut down sailing!", and as one of my favorite authors, Mark Twain, said ...  "Loyalty to the country always.  Loyalty to the government when it deserves it".

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

Jersey Shore?!

Jersey shore in Mississippi?  Photo courtesy of Hard Rock Biloxi

The weather this past 3-day weekend was beautiful, and it was hard to look at our sailboat sitting in the backyard knowing that we can't give her a Spring cleaning or take her sailing just yet.  Ken's two wrists are still sore, and so is his side.  He seems to be getting better, but at a snail's pace.  With working during the week and trying to only supervise whenever he can, we know he needs to take it easy on the weekends.

Our weekend consisted of some minor repairs to our rental, a few errands, and a lot of time on the sofa.  Ken was hoping to pressure wash Nirvana, but he realized it wouldn't be good for his recovery.  I wanted to  wash the boat, but Ken wants to do it himself so I didn't argue.   Hopefully next weekend we'll have more good weather and Ken will be feeling better.  We can't wait to get Nirvana cleaned up and sailing soon.  Our last sail was in August of 2012, right before Hurricane Isaac blew through our roof and damaged our sheetrock.  After all house repairs were made, it was winter and holy cow ... it's almost June!

We needed to do something fun to keep our mind off of what we couldn't do, so Sunday we went to the Mississippi Gulf Coast.  Our first stop was "Detox" at the Hard Rock Casino in Biloxi.  Every summer they have a free pool party with a DJ and drink specials, so we brought our bathing suits and figured we'd check it out for a little while.  It didn't take long before we felt like we were at the Jersey shore.  Everywhere you looked were body-builder guys and Snookie look-a-like girls.  Both the girls and the guys were covered in tattoos and the girls had perfect hair and makeup, tiny bikinis, and high heels ... every one of them.  It was clear they had no intentions of getting in the pool.  We were in a meat market!  If I would have had my camera with me, I would have tried to sneak in a few pictures.  It was something to see.  I posted a picture above from the Hard Rock's site, but it just doesn't give you the idea.  The guys and girls in the picture look great, but still look like regular folks.  I swear every girl had the long dark hair, big glasses, heels and jewelry just like Snookie!  The guys looked like they had too many steroid shots.

We stayed for just over an hour as we took in all of the sights.  Techno music blasted while girls danced provocatively in front of their man or walked around the pool over and over ... and over.  "Cigarette girls" gave out free electronic cigarettes while walking around in stiletto heels and forties-style dresses that didn't quite cover their butt ... Ken didn't mind.  Of course, the free admission was made up in $10 drinks.  After feeling like we were in another world, we knew we wouldn't be staying too long and waited till our next stop before having a drink.

Our experience at the pool party was different.  We were glad we went, but it wasn't our thing.  At first we felt old and out of touch, but the more we watched these people prancing around trying to outdo each other, the more we didn't give a crap if we were older or out of shape.  What do these people do for a living?  Do they work at all or do they get a huge allowance from Mom and Dad?  Don't get me wrong, I'm sure some of these people are great but ... the whole thing was so about appearance, not getting wet, and trying to look sexy.  We are all about "real", and this was about as far away from that as you could get.  A pool party with a volleyball net in the pool and women with ponytails and wet hair are more our style.  We left and headed to our kinda world ... Margaritaville!

Wow, what a difference a couple of miles make!  We grabbed a seat at the bar that overlooked the bay, ordered a couple of  $3 Landsharks, and listened to two guys playing great acoustic tunes.  The people that were hanging around this bar were laughing, wearing flip-flops and cut-off jeans, and not worried if the wind blew their hair.   I bet they're a lot happier too.  Much better!

When Monday came around, it sure was nice to not have to go to work!  Since Ken was out and about the day before, we needed to have a lazy day.  We decided to do something we've never done on Memorial Day before ... we went to a nearby ceremony to honor our fallen soldiers.  The ceremony was only about 30 minutes long, but it really brought home what Memorial Day is all about.  There were a lot of veterans, and some of them looked to be in their 80's and 90's.  When I saw their faces, it made me regret waiting 46 years to attend one of these ceremonies.  Our veterans need to see that people support them and appreciate what they've done for our country.  I was glad to be among the people that attended, which weren't a whole lot when you think of our city's population.  I was filled with emotion when listening to "Taps" and the 21-gun salute.  

Veterans who performed "Taps" and a 21-gun salute before placing of the wreath

The story of "Taps" was told at the ceremony.  Did you know that "Taps" was written by a fallen soldier that was found on the battlefield by his father (also a soldier)?  The father didn't realize the soldier was his son, and at the time didn't even know if the soldier was one of his own or an enemy.  He got the fallen soldier out of harm's way and it turned out the soldier was a Confederate .. the enemy.  Only after the two had made it off the battlefield did the father realize the soldier was his son.  His son, a musician, had decided to join the Confederates without his father's knowledge.  In the son's pocket was a folded piece of paper with musical tunes on it.  At his funeral the music was played ... it was "Taps".  It's since been a symbolic song for our fallen soldiers.  What an amazing story!  I was filled with emotion when listening to "Taps" and the 21-gun salute that took place before the tradition of the placing of the wreath on a soldier's grave.

American flags were scattered across the cemetary

We spent the rest of the day hanging around the house.  I baked some awesome baby back ribs!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

Live On The Margin - A Review

When I heard that Pat Schulte was writing a book about how he's been generating income while living the dream of traveling the world, I was excited!  I'd already read his first book about sailing around the world without any sailing experience, Just Looking Out For Pirates, and I've been following his blog, Bumfuzzle, for almost 4 years now.

Over the years, Pat has mentioned a time or two that he trades on the internet for additional income.  I'd always been intrigued by this, since Pat and his wife Ali hadn't held a typical job in years!  They retired in their late twenties and were traveling the world by sailboat, a VW bus, a Porsche, and now another sailboat.  What was Pat doing?!  I love numbers and I think I'm pretty intelligent, but they didn't teach me this stuff in school.  I keep up with the daily activity of the Dow Jones on television, and I often wish that I had the knowledge (and money) to participate.  As I thought it would, the Dow has slowly gone up the past couple of years.  How could I learn this stuff?  I didn't have a clue, until now.

With Pat's writing style, I knew that if anyone could write a book about how to trade options in a way that I could understand ... it would be Pat!  He's got a great writing style, and he's not going to publish a book just for the sole purpose of making a profit.  If he's gonna write a book about trading, he's gonna make sure the content is valid, helpful and easy to understand.  

As soon as "Live on the Margin" became available, I immediately ordered the Nook version (Kindle version here) and started reading it.  Did it disappoint?  This book was even better than I expected!   Before reading this book, I had never heard of stock options.  After reading this book, I now know what stock options are, why they're a better "bang for your buck" than regular stocks, what to look for in making trading decisions, and what internet sites offer the services of trading online.   I now have a whole new understanding of how generating income in stocks is possible and how it all works.  

As the book states, trading is a form of gambling!  The book also covers the psychological aspect of trading, which I think is yet another great aspect of this book.  Our human emotions of fear and loss can greatly affect our decisions, and this book talks about how to deal with these emotions when trading.  A better understanding of human nature provides a better chance of trading successfully.

Since Ken and I are seriously interested in learning how to trade, today I ordered the paperback version.  We want to have this version so that we can easily refer to the book until we get the hang of things.  This isn't the kind of thing you read once if you're a beginner like us.  However, I think that this book provides everything we need to know to get started.  We're excited about our new "business venture"!

                                                                        

If you're not seriously interested in trading, this still might be a book that you'd enjoy.  The first part of the book speaks of a living a different lifestyle and  having a different mindset of what "success" is.  Most of us have been raised to think a certain way and live a certain way.  Pat writes about the "slacker", which isn't exactly what our parents have raised us to become.  However, the slacker doesn't look for entitlements or handouts.  Instead, the slacker is self-sufficient, keeps expenses low, and lives his/her passion with freedom from debt and material "anchors".   Yep, I now know what I am at heart .. a slacker!   

I will also note that Pat wrote this book with another "slacker" that he met through the slacker lifestyle.  The book tells both of their stories of how they've achieved their dreams through just a few days a week (or month) in the trading market.  This book is not only a great learning tool, but an inspiration.  Kudos to both of them for such a great job!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

A Sense of Freedom!

Sailing Nirvana!

Three years into our cruising plan and two months of working on our house ... we've got  her on the market!   The decision to go cruising was made pretty much within minutes after visiting Hawaii, but implementing the plan is taking much longer!  In fact, I've changed our "Plan" page a couple of times.  I've had to push back the dates, and in doing so wondered what the heck we were thinking in the beginning!  We actually thought we'd be cruising in 2011, then 2012 ... and now 2013.  If the house sells in a decent amount of time 2013 is well within our means.  Our house and all its repairs have been an anchor, sucking up our time and energy.

Within an hour of listing our house we did the most appropriate thing, we said "hello" to an old friend ... Nirvana!  She's been shunned the past nine months, barely leaving the dock.  I'd guess we've only "played" with her 3-4 times since last October.  We tell her that it's all for "her own good", because the more time spent getting our house ready to sell means the more time we have for her in the future ... a lot more time!

We took Nirvana sailing for the weekend, along with some of her friends (and ours).   As the thunder, lightning and rain gave way to clear skies we made a convoy out of Slidell and across Lake Pontchartrain towards Mandeville.  

We went through the Hwy 11 bridge and raised the sails!

The weather continued to improve, making for a perfect sailing day!  There's nothing like the sensation of silencing the motor, hearing only the wind in the sails and the waves hitting the boat, and feeling your sailboat being pulled across the water!  As Nirvana began to "heel", Ken and I began to relax.  Heeling has not only become familiar, but it has become something I really enjoy!  (It does still feel a little weird when I'm behind the wheel).  Sailing provides such a peaceful feeling, and it really brings us in touch with nature and the world.  I know that sounds like a cliche, but it really is true!  Quickly forgotten is the hustle and bustle of life, along with its material things that society has raised us to believe we "need".  Each day we sailed most of the four-hour passage, and we didn't even turn on the radio.  We just listened to the wind and the waves and we may as well have been sailing 100 years ago.  We left civilization for a while!

We're enjoying our new Lowrance ... it's fun to see our route and what speed we're going!  If you look close, you can see Mandeville is located right next to the "5".

We all tied up at the Mandeville lakefront and filled up the wall.  During our stay, several people stopped to admire our boats and ask questions.  They were intrigued with sailing and staying on a boat.  I think we appeared as "having the life", which I guess we do.  What they didn't know was we all had to be at work on Monday ... but not for much longer!

We had a great time with friends and a total of four sailboats.  The photo below was taken the next morning, which was beautiful with blue skies and low humidity!

After a relaxing morning we all untied and headed back into the lake for another great day of sailing!

Being able to sail while knowing that our house is on the market gave us a small sense of freedom.  While we still have a lot to do before we cruise, we think the hardest part has been done.  Getting to this point took a lot of time, patience, focus, determination, financial and mental stress, and sweat.

The little taste of freedom that we stole this past weekend has us wanting more!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

* We have more pictures of our weekend on our Facebook page, under our "Sailing Louisiana" album!

Memorial Day - A Child's Story

On this Memorial Day, I wanted to remind everyone to remember the fallen men and women in our military.  When doing a little research on national parks for my Frugal Friday post, I came across an interesting story about Memorial Day, a young girl, and her act of kindness.

On Memorial Day, there is an annual tradition of decorating soldiers' graves with wreaths and flowers.  This tradition began shortly after the Civil War, and was first suggested by the women of Columbus, Georgia 1866. The custom went national two years later through the adoption of a May 30th date by the Grand Army of the Republic, a Union Veterans organization.

In February 1862, Confederate prisoners of war were held in warehouse buildings for about a month.  The prisoners that died there were buried in the Greenbush Cemetery in Lafayette, Indiana.  In the spring of 1868, a committee was organizing the annual ceremony and received a wreath from a local girl.  Attached to the wreath was a note that said:

"Will you please put this wreath upon some rebel soldier's grave.  My dear papa is buried at Andersonville, and perhaps some little girl will be kind enough to put a few flowers upon his grave".  -  Jennie Vernon

The wreath that Jennie provided was placed on a grave in the cemetery, and the story of her kindness was reprinted throughout the nation that summer.  It turned out that Jennie was twelve years old, and she had lost her father at a military prison near Andersonville, Georgia in 1864.  Her father is buried in the Andersonville National Cemetery .. Section K, grave #2428.

It's not known if anyone placed flowers on the grave of Jennie's father in 1868.  However, her story is a reminder of Jennie's father and all of our nation's fallen soldiers.  Please take this day to honor them!  If you'd like to read the article, you can find it here.

Memorial Day has also become thought of as the beginning of summer, so I hope you all have a great day and a great summer too.  Thanks to our military, we still have our freedom!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

We're Going Places!

                                                                                       We're Official Now!

Saturday's mail had a pleasant surprise in it ... our passports!  This is an exciting time for us, because our passports represent our future ... we're going places!   The first destination in our passport books ... Jost Van Dyke in the British Virgin Islands!   We hoped that our passports would arrive before our vacation to St. Thomas, because the BVI's are just a short ferry ride away.  Now we include the British Virgin Islands in our vacation to the US Virgin Islands and we're so excited!  We can't wait to visit Foxy's (and maybe meet the legend), have a Painkiller at The Soggy Dollar, and soak in the Bubbly Pool ... all of these things are on Jost Van Dyke and wouldn't be possible to visit without our little navy book.

These passport books are a first for the both of us, and this book allows us to "pass without delay or hindrance" ... hmmm.  I don't know about the "pass without delay" part, but at least we can "pass".  I was surprised to find a bunch of really great quotes in this little book.  I had no idea!  Here are a couple:

"The cause of freedom is not the cause of a race or a sect, a party or a class - it is the cause of humankind, the very birthright of humanity".    Anna Julia Cooper

"We send thanks to all the Animal life in the world.  They have many things to teach us as people.  We are glad they are still here and we hope it will always be so".   Excerpt from the Thanksgiving Address, Mohawk version

We felt like Steve Martin in the movie, "The Jerk".  Do you remember how excited Steve Martin was when he saw his name in the phone book?!  He was somebody important damn it!  Okay, we weren't that excited but we love that movie and thought about that hilarious scene ... so here it is for your viewing enjoyment.

                                                                  

Things are gonna start happening to us now!  Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

NKOTB - Changing Course

NKOTB (New Kids On The Boat) ... A Weekly Series Sharing Our Thoughts and Questions as Beginner Sailors and Future Cruisers.  NKOTB or Experienced Cruiser ... Tell Us Your Thoughts!

While many of today's cruisers are fortunate enough to have a "home base" to return to for a break, there are another set of cruisers that have to give up everything they've worked for to fulfill their dreams.  We're part of the latter group.  For us, a key part of entering the cruising world is having to "change course".  No longer will we be following the path of keeping and maintaining automobiles, a house,and all that stuff that goes with it. 

Choosing a new course down that big, blue watery road means going "against the flow".  (This was almost the name of our sailboat).  It means changing the way we've been raised to think by society.  After all, aren't we all pretty much raised to dream of that cute house with the white picket fence, the dog, and shiny vehicles in the driveway?  We're taught that success and happiness is measured by how many material items we've claimed ... it's our validation! 

Changing course will not be a breeze (pun intended)!  While we're excited about a new chapter in our lives, we're trying to prepare ourselves for those "What Are We Doing?!" days.  However, we know that these feelings are normal.  I love psychology and analyzing things, so I figure that these feelings are to be expected because getting rid of everything for a new course means taking a risk ... the risk of failure or disappointment.  After all, what if we don't like cruising (highly doubt it), or something terrible happens?  If so, then we'll be faced with the fact that we've given it all up for nothing! 

But, it won't be for nothing.  No matter what, we'll have "gone for it", and that's so much better than always wondering "what if".  So many people dream of things but never achieve those dreams because turning a dream into reality is often not easy!  It takes planning, patience, risk, and sacrifice.  It also takes the right attitude,  a "can do" attitude.  I read a quote the other day by Henry Ford that I love ... "Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right."  

Many cruisers speak of the freedom that comes with their lifestyle, and that is a big perk for us.  With so many things weighing us down right now, we look forward to the opportunities that we'll have while cruising and afterwards.  We'll be able to go and do whatever we choose.  Stories of low-cost living in Ecuador or Mexico sound interesting.   Our decisions on where we live and what we do won't have to be based on selling a house first, as we're currently facing.  Limiting possessions prevents limiting options!

So, what have you given up to reach your cruising dream (or any other)?  Did you ever have those moments where you thought you'd lost your mind going for such a thing?  We'd love to hear the sacrifices you've taken, and the feelings that went with them.

BTW  ... cheers to those cruisers that choose to bring their children along with them!  We think these kids are truly lucky to be exposed to such a wonderful and different course in life.  While we did not raise our daughter on a boat, it's our hope that we'll still be able to "wow" her, as well as our future grandkids and son-in-law (she's only 19 and in college right now).  There is more than one course in life, but most just don't realize it!

Hasta luego ... until then.  Mid-Life Cruising!

Note:  Here are the previous posts from this series.  Check them out and feel free to give us your advice.  We've really enjoyed reading your comments!

• NKOTB - Bad Weather!                                               NKOTB- The Anchor!
• NKOTB - Sailing Experience Required?!             NKOTB - The Right Boat!
• NKOTB - How Much Will Cruising Cost?             NKOTB - Cruising ... The Guilt Trip
• NKOTB - Private Space                                               NKOTB - Overnight Passages
• NKOTB - Hygiene!                                                         NKOTB - "Down Under"!
• NKOTB - Sea Creatures!                                              NKOTB - Comfort!
• NKOTB - Memories n Melodies!                               NKOTB - Storage On A Boat
• NKOTB - Power!                                                              NKOTB - Pirates and Crime